“Beloved”

Tom Barnard

 

“The greatest trap in our lives is not success, popularity, or power, but self-rejection.

Self-rejection is the greatest enemy of the spiritual life because it contradicts the

Sacred voice that calls us ‘Beloved.’”

Henry Nouwen

 

If I were asked to name my top three spiritual traps to avoid—or even my top ten—self-rejection would not be on my list. As a child I never heard my parents say to me, “You are worthless. You never will amount to anything. You don’t have a friend in this world.” On the contrary, I received plenty of affirmation for my childish efforts, whether earned or not. Even when my dad said “No” to any number of my requests, I could always depend on my mom whispering to him moments later, “Now Mac.” Or if she were really riled up, she would use his given name, “Now Malcolm!” I cannot remember my mom ever calling me by my given name, “Thomas!” She softened criticism, even when it was deserved. If she ever had a “bad hair” day, I never saw it. So, I never seriously cultivated self-rejection because it was never modeled by my parents when I was young. But I have known many young people (and adults as well) for whom self-rejection was higher on their spiritual-trap list than success, popularity, or power. We need to be reminded that Jesus called his disciples (including Judas at the time) “chosen.” They were his “beloved.” So are we. It doesn’t get any better than this.

 

Heavenly Father, thank you for reminding me at week’s end that I count for something. Even when my efforts have failed to result in high praise from my peers, you have left notes around saying, “Good going, child.” The voice that screams always condemns and criticizes me for everything I try to do for you, but Your Voice whispers affirmation and encouragement. And it is for Your Voice that I am listening now. I know you must chasten me when I fail to measure up to an acceptable level of performance, but even then, your divine scolding is accompanied by words of encouragement. Because of that, I feel honored to be called your “Beloved.” Amen.